Archive | July, 2012

First face to face meeting Inari and Hilla

8 Jul


Finally I met Inari in Recklinghausen, close to Düsseldorf, where she was performing with her cleaning patrol.
Inari, I am very happy that I met you and it was great how it happened.
At the moment we saw for the very first time in real it felt very, very familiar, like I already know you for a long time and like it is just normal to meet on the market place in Recklinghausen or just another place.
The place where we met is 500 km away from Berlin.
I connected it with the visit of a very good friend I have not seen for years who is living now in Essen, which takes about 45 minutes to get to Inari`s performance..
I only knew the time and possible places of the outdoor performance of Inari.
It was raining, so I was not really sure wether it will take place and I had no phonenr. from Inari.
I thought about Antoni`s tram performance which I tried to see in Szczecin two years ago, also having information about time and space, and was missing. But finally I have met Antoni in a totally other space, where neither he nor I expected it.
So I was hanging out in Recklinghausen, having coffee, trying to get some information, but nobody knew more than I.
I became a little nervous. I mean 500km are a long way for missing a performance.
But then they came: 3 beautiful old women with black dresses, white aprons, buckets and brushes and started cleaning the market place and singing with a bucket over the head.
Inari gave me right away her camera and I had the pleasure to film them what was really fun to follow their ways.
Again I am included in a performance with the first meeting. Great.




Unexpected connections

8 Jul

Inari, knowing that we meet in May in Berlin, but not being able to come has send us a book about Lapland.

I found out that I am already well-known there:

Hilla : Cloudberry (Rubus chamaemorus)

After mid-July the people of Kittilä begin to show signs of “cloudberry fever”, to an outsider this is completely alien. Checking the tours for mapping the best places are made at the beginning of July. Keeping their own cloudberry marshes a secret seems to be the locals`purpose in life.

The best cloudberry picking season is usually when July changes into August. Observing the weather and prices of the cloudberry buyers is the hobby of late summer for people within the municipality. The youngest in the as well as the serious pickers of cloudberry with their big plastic bags, rucksacks and tents are found throughout the province.

The correct method of picking a cloudberry is essential for sparing the crop. Locals try to teach the right methods to pickers from outside the municipality. Often the unexperienced will pick a berry when it is still unripe resulting in undeveloped fruit, bad taste and aroma.

On the way to the other side

8 Jul

Simona and her partner Nikolaus were traveling overland from Vienna to Japan. It took them 2 month to get there. They were taking their feet, horses, cars, busses, trains and a ship slowly moving and getting in touch with what was on their path: people, culture, nature, borders, images. On their blog we get some insights, great pictures and small comments which not only document the journey, but also give a lot of (emotional) information about how to be in and meet other cultures and ways to artistic transformation.

I am very happy that Simona is with us in the same boat!!!

please have a look:



Meeting May 26th in Berlin

5 Jul

Joan, Claudia, Ildiko and I, Hilla, met here in Berlin.

Slowly getting to know each other personal. Ildiko and Joan already met in Madrid on a performance festival.
I believe that one really good way to converge is to eat and drink, spending time together.
I also love to do that for others.

Our aim is to perform together. That`s why I started our meeting with a little performance, including the others. Nothing new for me, but always different.
This time I collected wishes which we wrote on paper relating to INSIDEOUT. The paper gets into water, soaked and later pressed and dried to a ball, which will be part of another art work.

The boat somehow became a deeper meaning for me for INSIDEOUT: it is the symbol of traveling long ways through all kind of waters to reach our goals .

in side out


nothing concrete
but the moments
of joy

may be

we all are
in the same boat


each movement
a new position



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First face to face meeting Joan and Hilla, 19.5.2012

4 Jul

Finally I met Joan in person and as it happened we met in the most appropriate way that performance artists who want to do a project together can meet.
Joan`s performance FOLLOW ME was so honest, authentic, light and deep at the same time and opening up  that I am just happy that I followed him all the way up in the tree.
Really a great piece!!! Thank you, Joan, for those great experiences.
And I am very happy that you are with us INSIDEOUT.

Bi-lingual encounter, music and emotions

3 Jul

Communication is one of the pillars of INSIDEOUT
Ildiko and I, Hilla, had a long conversation about how differently words/language can be understood depending on the own mother tongue where words are connected to emotions and meaning:

Bi-lingual encounter, music and emotions

by Ildiko Meny

One of my last attempts of a course in Spanish language was cut short because of the very attractive and very busy young teacher. At eight in the morning she forced the small class of four pupils to rapidly spur on irregular verbs and made us count to hundred, hacking the numbers in her laptop in the speed of her language…usually I like this speed, but at eight in the morning I need more time to sort out my daily duties and all the different languages and thoughts that are uploading the moment every new morning I open my eyes… of dreams, plans, listening to my kids and sorting my daily duties just don’t match with the declination of irregular Spanish verbs at eight in the morning, so the course was only sounds and negative emotions…….”cantar sin canzion”.

For me to learn a new language is first by listening to the music and sounds … real songs but also the music and sounds of single words and expressions. I was always fascinated by this musicality of language since I entered the world of words and sometimes I am still struck by interference of meaning and sound of a word in any language. Then I think a lot only about one word and this fulfills me with pleasure to learn more words in any language or to explore deeper the ones I already know.

When I sing Hungarian cradle songs to my children they feel like one word filled with sounds of sleepy love. Maybe that’s the function of cradle songs but when I first listened to Spanish cradle songs (Canción de Cuna de las Canciones Negras de Xavier Montsalvatge) the same emotional reaction filled in immediately, even when I had to hear them twice to understand the meaning, which often is very easy and simple…I am not a linguist, but the sounds of single words are so wonderful, that they lead to a whole emotionally loaded song in my brain. Sometimes because of the power of my own imaginations and associations, which often lead to a completely wrong direction, is “perro,- dog” in Spanish, coming from perilous….peligroso…no, it is not!

Maybe this is leading to so many misunderstandings in any language, we hear a word or a sentence and immediately there is a certain song sang in our brain, which does not correspond with the song in the speakers mind. (pupils all over the world can sing a “lament” on this everyday,” to be in the wrong place at the wrong time of day with the wrong person!”) Languages of emotions are individually different any time and anywhere, even when we use the very same words and language.

When I was teaching medical students about communication the fact that the transport of meaning is more than fifty percent non verbally, makes me think on how we dare to use the email and internet as one of our first and overestimated communication channels and how many and what parts of the message are lost?

What about all the misunderstandings, the misinterpretations and the blame, maybe we should communicate in Axioms not in words…

What do we hear and understand from what somebody says or writes? What remains? And how does that affect our continuative thoughts and actions?

I am also persuaded from the idea that I learn only from a person if I established trust and vividly interact with that person…I think I couldn’t get in touch with my young attractive Spanish teacher at all, even when I asked her for more time to make my homework, but I was to sleepy and lazy to analyze this more in depth.

When I started to learn French at age six, the beginning was also by singing songs that I still remember, even when these songs where more kind of little marching songs, but I used them for me the last time I had a dentists appointment…and I am still in deep affection with French poetry….I never encountered a better word for sigh than “sanglot “.

Les sanglots longs                 The long sobs
Des violons                              Of the violins
De l’automne                           Of Autumn
Blessent mon cœur                Wound my heart
D’une langueur                       With a monotonous
Monotone.                               Languor.

Maybe one day I will dig deeper into onomatopoeia (a word that imitates or suggests the source of the sound that it describes. Onomatopoeia as an uncountable noun refers to the property of such words.) So poets make use of this and some good writers and journalists probably also. Maybe intuitively.

When I entered the INSIDEOUT performance project I was struck by the combination of the performing body and culture and the search for the expression of it in a completely free and experimental way…I am emotionally and intellectually linked to one of the artists and I am very curious to get in touch with all the others…the more personal the better, since I expect to dig into deeper cores of myself or watch the others do this and share in their home countries and places where they feel emotionally connected. And I am very keen to know how much those emotions are affected from either personal or culturally (probably both) stained experiences and how they will translate this into the project…movements, pictures, gestures, drawings and words…..

Tout suffocant                       All choked
Et blême, quand                   And pale, when
Sonne l’heure,                      The hour chimes,
Je me souviens                     I remember
Des jours anciens                old days
Et je pleure                             And I cry

Et je m’en vais                       And I’m going
Au vent mauvais                   On an ill wind
Qui m’emporte                      That carries me
Deçà, delà,                             Here and there,
Pareil à la                               As if a
Feuille morte.                        Dead leaf.

Verlaine – Chanson d’ automne

Madrid – March 2012